"It's been a minute..."
When a restaurant won't let me view their menu online without actually starting an order first.
"Good friends, good times."
I got an unwich from Jimmy John's, and the wrapper is rolled up in the lettuce.
The person who has been revving their engine for the past 20 minutes.
"This ______ is a whole mood."
"That looks just like my [cat name]!"
When I try to highlight a single field and it highlights the whole freaking page instead.
It's been a long week today.
STOP STARTING SENTENCES WITH "I MEAN"
Today is one of the rare days when it's 85 degrees in the office and I'm not dressed for it.
When people say "as to"
Actually, not everyone wants to be surrounded by people, thankyouverymuch.
Accidentally typing a Daze entry into GrumpLog
"make no mistake"
I just realized I didn't eat breakfast today.
I can manage multiple tasks. But I can't manage multiple crises.
When the bottom of your shoe squeaks down the side of your desk and sounds like flatulence...
EVERYTHING IS ON FIRE
I was going through my closet two weekends ago and found a couple pairs of sandals I'd forgotten I had. They were a little old but seemed to still be in good condition. I wore one pair of them to work today, and by noon, the whole top of the sandal had come detached from the bottom. :-/
I lost a Bombas sock at the laundromat.
Declarations of how bad [fill in the blank] is these days.
A live wasp nest in the smoker
Those "Before you go..." popups when you click the back button on a webpage
A big spider rappelling from the ceiling in our bedroom this morning.
This iced espresso was 2/3 ice.