How gross my keyboard looks after 8 months of use.

Trains.

This sportscaster just called quotation marks parenthesis.

Waking up an hour earlier than needed only because you failed to read the email.

Mozilla has removed Google as an option in Thunderbird's search engine support.

EVERYTHING is pissing me off tonight.

Why do I have this tension between my shoulders already?

Having to work the holiday.

I just tried to post on nextdoor to tell my idiot neighbors to stop with the fireworks. It didn't post because my account is inactivated for some reason and I can't be bothered to try to unlock it at this late hour.

I am falling asleep at my desk.

I have a smell in my nose and taste in my mouth that is reminiscent of old soggy ash trays that have been left in the rain and sun for days.

As I typed up that last Grump, I kept thinking "Twitter == Trump".

Twitter strips the protocol prefix out of the URL that you Tweet.

I just saw someone had an OOO statement because they were ill. I felt jealous.

Verse's file previewer should accept the escape key to close the preview.

OBIEE's report generating format.

People not pronouncing "UUID" and "GUID".

People pronouncing "UUID" and "GUID".

I am entirely too tired to be doing anything of importance today.

Everyone on the road this morning was being an ass.

It might just be condensation, but there is water coming out of the AC vent in the bathroom.

Ass stains on the toilet seat.

I just attempted to clean the house a little, doing some very low impact stuff (sorting mail) for about 10 minutes, and now it is almost impossible to walk.

Somehow I scratched the face of my new watch already.

As much as PowerPoint is used in this company, it amazes me how much everyone struggles with using PowerPoint.

I unsubscribed from HBR emails months ago. I just got another email from them.

I was about 2 minutes late to a massive wreck on my way in. I got caught in traffic and tried to exit the ramp that was right next to me, but every time I threw my turn signal on, people decided to close the gap and not let me over. On top of all of that, I was approaching bingo on fuel.

My eye is still twitching.

Slack keeps falling offline.

Followed the cooking directions on my lasagna, it came out somewhat burned and the noodles were tough. Trying to eat it, my plastic fork broke into several little pieces that got lost in the pasta. Now I need to go find an alternate lunch.